Ep.84 Listen to the pinnacle chapter of Lies of the Magpie. Maleah’s struggles and months of searching for how to heal her body finally come together in an unexpected way. Did you predict this twist?
Ep. 80 Listen to these FREE sample chapters from the best-selling memoir Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Day Warner. In these chapters, Maleah questions whether she is “sick enough” to merit seeing a doctor. The challenge is that she isn’t bleeding, bruised, or having any specific pain. She knows she doesn’t feel “right,” but struggles to put what is wrong into words. She is terrified the doctor will say it’s “depression.” For Maleah, depression isn’t a legitimate illness, but rather a judgment of a person’s weak character. Maleah thinks she would rather get a cancer diagnosis than be told she has postpartum depression. In the end, her diagnosis isn’t at all what she expected, and will create more complications and confusion as the story progresses.
Today’s audio selection brings listeners to the end of Part 2 and the beginning of Part 3.
Chapter 30 I Need a Mother Feeling shaky and weak, Maleah gives a presentation to the Chamber of Commerce. Driving home she is dizzy and disoriented and doesn’t have breast milk to feed Jack. Aaron asks why she won’t go to a doctor. Maleah worries that she isn’t really sick enough to go to a doctor and that people think she is a lazy faker.
Chapter 31 Ears to Hear Maleah takes Kate to a new ENT specialist who correctly diagnosis Kate’s hearing issues. Maleah realizes the difference a good doctor can make and determines to schedule an appointment for herself with a new doctor. When her efforts are thwarted, Aaron steps in to comfort her. He has a chance encounter with the doctor and is able to schedule Maleah an appointment.
Ep. 77 Enjoy these FREE sample chapters from the audio version of Lies of the Magpie.
In Chapter 26, Maleah discovers a computer file where Aaron has learned photo-editing by practicing on a picture of her. She compares the woman in the before and after photos and believes she is seeing how Aaron wishes he change her flaws.
The tension builds and in Chapter 27, Maleah feels that her chest is going to explode. She needs help, but fears the ER will pump her full of psychotropic drugs, lock her in the psych ward, and take away her children. In a desperate cry for help, she knocks on an old friend’s door at midnight.
Listen to sample chapters from Amazon’s #1 Hot New Release, Lies of the Magpie, a memoir and discover the book readers are calling “riveting.”
Things begins to unravel for Maleah as she juggles running a business and caring for newborn Jack while Kate starts kindergarten and Tanner resists giving up his crib to his new brother.
Ep. 72 Today’s episode is a FREE bonus audio selection from Maleah’s memoir, Lies of the Magpie featuring Chapters 18 -19.
In these chapters, baby Jack has joined the family in a hectic way and life for the Warners is spinning like a merry-go-round. These chapters pull readers into the heart and mind of a woman who has just given birth and is struggling to manage the needs of a newborn along with family life and obligations that were already in full motion before baby Jack joined the picture.
In Ch. 18 a near drowning at a resort pool causes Maleah to come apart at the seams. And Ch. 19 introduces us to that dubious character, Mr Why? who Maleah must entertain while struggling to remember, “What is that one important thing I needed to do today?”
Stay tuned for exciting announcements about the paperback release of Lies of the Magpie.
Ep. 35 Three NEW Ways to Approach Your Problems
How often do you hear you have to face your problems head-on?
FACING PROBLEMS HEAD-ON
Facing problems head-on sounds like the take-charge thing to do. I’m a proactive problem-solver and that means I’m going to take the bull by the horns, wrestle it to the ground, lasso its legs, stand up, raise my arms and declare victory.
But you’ve been around long enough—you’ve tried to solve problems this way—Darling, this ain’t your first rodeo, SO you know that at times our human existence is like living inside a China shop. One wrong move and you knock something valuable off the shelf. And if your approach to problem solving resembles wrestling a bull in a China Shop, well, you see what those results will be.
Miley Cyrus sums ups this approach with her lyrics, “You came in like a wrecking ball.” And take my word, trust me on this, you do NOT want a reenactment of THAT music video playing in your life.
Shattered things can be mended. China Shops can clean up after the bull runs through. Humans are actually quite repairable, but it’s always easier to not break something or someone in the first place.
Here are three Sidedoor Approaches to solve problems in a more effective way.
Sidedoor Approach #1: MINIMIZE
Keeps problem small by not giving them FRONT DOOR attention.
Maybe this problem doesn’t deserve Front Door attention. This little thing is a side-issue. Keep it small where it belongs and let more important things through the FRONT DOOR.
The side door is for intimate guests, right? Your family and closest friends come through the side door, so keep problems within your intimate circle. If we hang our problems on the front door like one of those seasonal wreaths, that’s the first thing people see about us. That’s how we get defined and identified, by our problems. Remember the saying: Don’t Deck the Halls with Your Follies.
Sidedoor Approach #2: DISSIPATE CONFLICT ENERGY
A SIDEDOOR APPROACH resolves problems by dissipating conflict energy. As humans we are made of energy, everything around us is energy, everything we do and accomplish in life is energy. Most of the time we ignore it. We aren’t conscious of where our energy is directed or what we’re doing with it.
If I face a problem head-on, it’s Me vs The Problem. It’s a face-off. Opposing football teams line up this way, which is okay because they are there for a conflict. Old-time battles were fought head-on. Think of the term front line. If you were on the front line, you knew things weren’t going to go well for you.
One day I showed up to my church’s women’s group. The chairs were set up in two lines facing each other. The set-up was intended to foster discussion, but for some reason the entire lesson, I wanted to punch somebody. Someone would make a comment, and I wanted to argue.
Human energy Face to Face is naturally confrontational. It’s powerful and it’s repelling, like magnetic poles. Like I said, we are 90% of the time going through life unconscious of where we’re throwing our energy. It’s like giving a laser gun to a toddler.
What is the Solution?
During the Revolutionary War, the Colonists, with less ammunition and resources, won battles by not fighting head on. They found victory through “sidedoor” battle tactics.
Am I feeding conflict energy by approaching this head on?
Am I fueling negative energy by my approach?
Could a simple adjustment of my physical demeanor resolve the struggle?
What about a simple adjustment to my emotional energy.
Sidedoor Approach #3: QUESTION THE ROADBLOCK
Maybe the problem isn’t a problem. Maybe what (or who) you think is in your way, isn’t blocking you at all. Maybe you’re hitting up against this block over and over like a football player hitting against those tackling dummies. You think you’ve got to conquer this in order to move forward, so you keep ramming against it and it beats you down every time.
What if that ROADBLOCK doesn’t need your attention?
What if you can simply move around it?
What if the thing you BELIEVE is in your way, isn’t blocking you at all?
What if the only reason it’s a PROBLEM is because you’re fixated on it and you’ve gotten in the habit of hitting up against it over and over again?
What if all you need to do is look past it and move on?
Ep. 32 Left at the Table
Three is the hardest number of children.
We adored Tanner, but adding the third child threw us completely off balance. For several months after bringing Tanner home from the hospital, we struggled to find our groove. “I’ve got Danny,” Aaron would say taking Danny by the hand when we’d arrive at a baseball game, a neighborhood swim party, or a church barbecue. I’d hoist Tanner’s car seat with two hands and balance the over-flowing diaper bag on my shoulder. Aaron would look at me, I would look at Aaron, and we’d both look at Kate who was poised ready to sprint away the second one of us unbuckled her safety belt. “I’ve got Danny and Kate,” Aaron would concede.
With two parents and three kids, there always seemed to be one child left unattended. It used to be that I would cut Kate’s meat and Aaron would help Danny. Now, during dinner, I sat on the couch nursing Tanner. “Kate, why aren’t you eating?” Aaron chastised. Kate looked up shyly, “Nobody cut my meat.”
The worst was the day we drove out of the neighborhood. I knew something felt off…“Go back! I left Tanner.” I unlocked the front door and came out carrying Tanner’s car seat. He’d been buckled in and was waiting on the living room floor to be carried to the car.
We carried on like this, completely off-kilter until a miraculous thing happened in July. Annice and Calvin went to Hawaii and left their three kids with us. We became parents to six kids under the age of nine. Annice showed up one week later with a gorgeous tan. I hadn’t brushed my own teeth in seven days. Going from six kids back to three seemed to reboot our system, and Aaron and I found a good rhythm balancing our own Danny, Kate, and Tanner.
Tanner was an easy baby an once again I began to wonder if being a mother was enough. Should I be doing more?
In the fall, Danny started preschool, Aaron went back to night school to become a Certified Financial Planner, and I started a part-time job selling advertising and writing articles for a local magazine. I thought it would be the perfect outlet for me—a way to keep my intellect sharpened and get out of the house a few hours a day. After two weeks, it was obvious the job situation wasn’t working. By the time I buckled the three kids into my car, dropped them off to three different locations, and drove twenty minutes to my sales area, I had forty minutes to contact business clients before it was time to pick up Danny from preschool.
“You’re always the last mom here,” Danny would say, the sweat dripping down his face from waiting outside for me.
One night in bed I leaned up on one elbow and told Aaron, “I need to quit my job.” I hoped he would say, “I agree. I don’t know how you keep up with three kids, working in the morning and teaching piano lessons in the afternoon.”
Instead, he said, “Why?”
“It’s too much,” I rambled. “I’m always late to pick up Danny, Tanner doesn’t get a good morning nap, and the money I make barely covers Kate’s babysitter. The kids are cranky. When I started working for the magazine, Tanner stopped sleeping through the night. I don’t think he’s getting enough milk. I’m tired. I’m falling asleep during piano lessons.”
“It’s only a few hours a week,” Aaron said.
“By the time I get everyone dressed, out the door, buckled into the car, dropped off and picked up again, it takes the whole morning.”
“You’re the one who wanted something productive to do,” Aaron offered.
I called my boss and told him my decision. “I wondered how you kept it going so long,” he said.
After that, I decided to slow down. Three kids took a lot of time. I needed to make a conscious effort not to over-schedule myself.
In December, Aaron asked if we could have his Client Christmas Party at our house.
“No,” I said.
“Why?” he asked.
“Because our house has only second-hand furniture and I have no idea what to cook for retired millionaires who have dined in the best restaurants around the world.”
“It wouldn’t have to be fancy,” Aaron argued. I held my ground.
The next day, while Aaron was at work, I saw Laiah sitting on my window sill. I hadn’t heard from her in a few months. “Aaron is disappointed with you. Your house should be more nicely decorated. That is your job as a homemaker. And you should know how to cater fancy work dinners. Your husband should be able to bring his clients home any time.”
A week after I declined hosting the client party, Aaron said, “Let’s drive to Utah for Christmas this year.”
“No,” I said again. “Why?”
“Because it’s been four years since we stayed home for Christmas. I want to have our own family Christmas at our own house where we can open presents and play with toys all day and never change out of our pajamas. I want to relax and enjoy Tanner’s first Christmas.”
“You can relax in Utah,” Aaron answered. I stood my ground.