Lies of the Magpie Ch 30 & 31

Woman reading Lies of the Magpie

Today’s audio selection brings listeners to the end of Part 2 and the beginning of Part 3.

Chapter 30 I Need a Mother Feeling shaky and weak, Maleah gives a presentation to the Chamber of Commerce. Driving home she is dizzy and disoriented and doesn’t have breast milk to feed Jack. Aaron asks why she won’t go to a doctor. Maleah worries that she isn’t really sick enough to go to a doctor and that people think she is a lazy faker.

Chapter 31 Ears to Hear Maleah takes Kate to a new ENT specialist who correctly diagnosis Kate’s hearing issues. Maleah realizes the difference a good doctor can make and determines to schedule an appointment for herself with a new doctor. When her efforts are thwarted, Aaron steps in to comfort her. He has a chance encounter with the doctor and is able to schedule Maleah an appointment. 

BONUS AUDIO: Lies of the Magpie Ch 22 & 23

Lies of the Magpie Readers

Listen to sample chapters from Amazon’s #1 Hot New Release, Lies of the Magpie, a memoir and discover the book readers are calling “riveting.” 

Things begins to unravel for Maleah as she juggles running a business and caring for newborn Jack while Kate starts kindergarten and Tanner resists giving up his crib to his new brother. 

BONUS AUDIO: Lies of the Magpie Ch 18 & 19

Lies of the Magpie Book Cover

Ep. 72 Today’s episode is a FREE bonus audio selection from Maleah’s memoir, Lies of the Magpie featuring Chapters 18 -19.

In these chapters, baby Jack has joined the family in a hectic way and life for the Warners is spinning like a merry-go-round. These chapters pull readers into the heart and mind of a woman who has just given birth and is struggling to manage the needs of a newborn along with family life and obligations that were already in full motion before baby Jack joined the picture. 

In Ch. 18 a near drowning at a resort pool causes Maleah to come apart at the seams. And Ch. 19 introduces us to that dubious character, Mr Why? who Maleah must entertain while struggling to remember, “What is that one important thing I needed to do today?”

Stay tuned for exciting announcements about the paperback release of Lies of the Magpie.

Lies of the Magpie Cover Reveal

Lies of the Magpie Cover Reveal

Lies of the Magpie Cover Reveal!

It’s time to reveal the FINAL COVER for Lies of the Magpie.

The final decision came down to one surprising element. (Read the end to learn the deciding factor.)

Thanks to everyone who has followed, made observations, and given feedback through this process.

There is a LOT of thought, calculation, and psychology that goes into designing a cover. If you are interested in the behind-the-scenes process of choosing the final cover, below I will walk you through the concept and evolution of each cover, the audience response, the pros & cons, and ultimately why the cover was or was not chosen.

If you just want to see the FINAL COVER, skip to the end. 

Commissioned Artwork

Cover Reveal Lies of the Magpie a memoir by Maleah Day Warner

The first cover was illustrated and painted by artist Bethany Baker three years ago. Check out her work at Midsummer Studios. She will create a custom whimsical portrait of your child, family, or fiancee.

Concept: “The Carnival of Life” Watercolor. Illustrates a mother’s role escorting her child on the rides of life.

Pros: I love the symbolism injected in custom artwork. The red balloon represents the woman’s hopes and dreams. The weight of the magpie is holding down the ballon, preventing it from rising to the height of its potential. Bethany designed the image to wrap around the book’s front and back cover and included space for the title and author.

Cons: I commissioned Bethany to create this cover in 2017 when I was considering self-publishing. Since then, I’ve learned the importance of matching the cover mood and style to the book’s genre. This painted image conveys a children’s picture book more than an adult memoir.

Commercial Artwork

In March I began working with my publisher’s cover designer. I gave her a synopsis of my book as well as the genre and overall tone and said I’d like a magpie and possibly a necklace. The following are the concepts she created. 

Woman’s Profile in Silhouette

Cover Reveal Lies of the Magpie a memoir by Maleah Day Warner

Concept: Vector image. This was the first design I previewed from the designer and it took my breath away. Seeing this made my story come alive.

Audience Response: Facebook Favorite. Marketing Specialist’s Favorite. This was the clear winner of all the vector images. 

Melanie: “To me it signifies there is something in all of us. From the outline of the women and the bird within.”

Colleen: “Creative flow and I love the color”

Kerry: “The theme Lies of the Magpie and it whispering in your ear fits.”

Shanda:  “It needs the silhouette of the girl for the human touch effect.”

Jill: “It draws me in. My kids who love to write voted this one as well.

Pros: The woman’s profile in silhouette hints she has a personal struggle. Something is stopping her from facing life straight on, and you get the hint the magpie plays a big role. Clear and easy to read.

Cons: Hard to find a con other than the weight of the image is heavy on the left and the mood is a bit depressing.

Woman at the Window

Concept: Live photography magpie at window. This was one of my early favorites.

Audience Response: Facebook Winner

Kylene:  “By far my favorite.”

Clarissa: “Caught my eye quick.

Tasha: “Intriguing.”

Lisa: “My least favorite. I find it a little confusing.”

Pros:  The image evokes curiosity and lets you know this will be an emotional story. Lovely use of black & white with hints of color.

Cons: Ultimately the cover is too confusing to understand at first glance. There is a lot going on. The title gets lost in the image. 

Magpie on a Tree Branch

Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Warner Book Cover

Concept: Live Photography of Magpie

Audience Response:

Larita: “Both Lies and Magpie are distinct and pop out. Neither words are mixed into the photo. So clear and grab at you.”

Laurel: “I like the emptiness and use of the negative space.”

Ryan: “Nice and simple. No images conflicting with the title.

Pros: People like this cover for its clarity and use of white space. 

Cons: Gives the impression of being a nonfiction nature book rather than literary memoir.

Magpie in Flight

Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Warner Book Cover

Concept: Thieving magpie flies away with the story.

Audience response: Editor’s Favorite.

Brooke: “Like the colors and letter font. Love the bird in flight

Ashley: “The blue one!”

Pros: The color and unique font. Reminds people of the book Wonder.

Cons: While the font is awesome, it’s also difficult to read. And it’s hard to tell if this book is for teens or adults. 

Magpie with Woman in Cage

Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Warner Book Cover

Concept: Woman in Cage. In an unintentional effort to confuse my cover designer and complicate the process, I found this image of a woman in a cage which I LOVED. My designer created a dozen variations of this concept including the magpie holding the cage by a chain in its talons. This is the cover I’ve had the hardest time letting go of.

Audience Response: Publisher’s Favorite. Author’s favorite (except for the final cover).

Kris Stena “It intrigues all of us in my family, makes us want to know why she’s in there.”

Sashleigha: “Girl in the cage for sure.

Tessy: “Shows there is a story within the book.”

Jean: “This is the most intriguing to me… it’s like… hmmmm. what’s this book all about???”

Roberti: “This one  feels very depressing and  personally, I would not pick it up.”

Pros: I love the idea of a woman trapped in the cage while the bird is outside calling the shots. A lot of power and metaphor in the image. Also conveys there is an intricate story within the pages.

Cons: Some readers were turned off by the oppressive tone of this cover image. Some confused it for a story about domestic violence.

Final Cut: While intriguing, this cover could trigger too much negative emotion and might mislead readers to thinking it’s a story of abuse.

Magpie Whispers in Woman’s Ear

Cover Reveal Lies of the Magpie a memoir by Maleah Day Warner

Concept: Live Photography with whispering magpie.

Audience Response: Mr. Warner’s Favorite. A Facebook Favorite, this cover tied in votes with the Magpie at the Window.

Brooke: “It looks like the magpie is whispering lies.

Emily: “This is my favourite – it’s alluring, intense, emotive.”

Janine: “I like this one best. I was intrigued and wanted to know what the magpie was whispering in her ear….”

Lori: “The visuals are mentally stimulating and curiosity evoking.”

Pros: This cover showcases what a rockstar the designer is. Look at the lighting on the woman’s hair! So much emotion. Title is clear and easy to read. 

Cons: My daughter thought this looked like the cover of a romance instead of memoir. Cover reveals too much of the story.

Final Cut: This cover almost needs a warning that says “Spoiler Alert.” It gives away too much too soon.

And the Final Book Cover Is . . .

Magpie with Necklace

Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Day Warner Book Cover

Concept: Simple illustration of magpie with locket in its beak.

Audience Response: Gotcha! I didn’t show this image on the Facebook or Instagram polls because I wanted it to be a surprise!

Abigail: “Love this. Looks very clean and professional.”

Cons: Interestingly, when shown to fellow authors from my publishers group, NOT ONE person voted for this cover. And yet this is the cover. WHY? There is a lot of calculation and psychology that goes into cover selection.

Pros:

  1. Title stands out: One strength of this book is an amazing title, and this cover lets the title do the talking.
  2. Clear: Many readers select a book based on a thumbnail image on Kindle, Overdrive, or Barnes & Noble online. These small images need to be clear and readable.
  3. Simple: If a cover is too complicated or confusing, a reader might assume the book will be too confusing and will pass it by.
  4. Tone: This book might be about postpartum depression, but the story is NOT depressing. This cover conveys a book filled with humor, colorful metaphor, propelling symbolism, and  narrative that is almost cartoon-like in its perspective on the struggle of family life.
  5. Curiosity: You can’t deny that this little magpie perks your curiosity. What is it doing with that necklace in its beak? This cover hints at mystery and surprise within the pages of the book. The reader anticipates being taken on a fascinating journey of discovery.

Final Cut: Ultimately, one factor finalized the decision to go with this book cover.

MEN!

Yes. You men were the deciding vote!

One might think a book that recounts pregnancy and childbirth in explicit detail might be just for women. However, the beta readers who finished fastest and had the most to say have all been men. A majority of my first endorsements were from men.

Perhaps this is because men have always wondered what goes on in a woman’s head and this book gives them a front row seat to one woman’s psyche. 

Ultimately, the final selling point was choosing a cover that wouldn’t be a barrier to men reading this powerful story. In addition to all the above factors, this is a cover a man could hold in an airport or have on his office desk or nightstand without appearing to be reading women’s romance.

What do you think?  Were you surprised?

I’d love to hear your comments. Thanks for following this cover journey.

Mother’s Day 2016

Maleah Warner website sliders

Four Years Ago . . .

Mother’s Day 2016

 

Leading up to Mother’s Day 2016, I was launching the Grand Opening of my website: mommaleah.com.

This Mother’s Day I am remembering significant events of four years ago that have impacted my life. Isn’t it interesting how events line up to change your trajectory?

At that time, I had decided to stop working on my memoir—the story of my healing journey through postpartum depression and chronic illness—which at that time was titled Prozac & Prayer. Writing my story had been an essential part of my healing process. But in 2016, it was ten years after the events of the book had taken place. Certainly women were no longer struggling with postpartum depression. I figured that the medical world had long since solved the issues and that new mothers were receiving the diagnosis and treatment they needed.

So it was time to move on to other projects. I outlined a series of nonfiction mothering books and brainstormed a website called mommaleah.com where I would teach and share all things related to mothering. The vision was a website where mothers take classes, learn tips, find awesome tools and resources, and be part of a mothering community.

The website included a bookshelf (because I love a library!) where women could check out blog posts, classes, books, videos, and sample my favorite things.

screen shot mommaleah.com library

I worked hard creating headers, learning javascript, and trying to make friends with technology. My goal was to build the website on my own as much as possible without running crying to my husband (the real technology genius) every time the computer was mean to me.

The preparation included writing blog posts, recording video, designing webinars, and teaching a mothering class at the Provo Library. 

There were sweepstakes and giveaways. Subscribers could win my favorite books or my favorite family movies. I was excited, but still, my heart wasn’t one hundred percent invested in this idea of teaching housekeeping tips and organization. (I mean, organization tips from me?)

Then something else also happened it 2016

The Emily Effect

In the process of planning, building, and preparing to launch mommaleah.com, I learned about the passing of Emily Cook Dyches due to complications of a postpartum-induced panic attack. Emily and I both went to Snow College. My brother was her middle school science teacher. She dated my husband’s best friend. Her passing was the wake-up call for me that maternal mental health issues had not been fixed and that there were real women still struggling to find help and healing.

As Emily’s family bravely shared her story, they taught me the power of story to bring healing, hope, light, and change.

So while going forward with mommaleah, I also pulled out my manuscript and tried to figure out how to transform my experiences from personal therapy into crafted literary narrative.

Working with an editor helped me learn how to let the story speak for itself. The manuscript got a new name: Lies of the Magpie and won 2nd place in the Utah Arts Council Original Writing Competition that year. The prize was $500, the first money I’d ever earned from writing.

Since that time, I have worked to fine-tune the story and also learn how to get it published. That is a long story for another post. 

Here, four years later, this story is ready to go into the world. 

I hope it will be found by a woman in need, so that she’ll know she isn’t alone and that another woman has been where she is. Most of all, I hope through story she will find relief, humor inside darkness, and the assurance that healing is possible. 

Today mommaleah.com looks like this:

screen shot maleahwarner.com

Typing mommaleah.com into your web browser now brings you to maleahwarner.com, an awesome website designed completely by Mr. Warner. You’ll notice that I have been podcasting for over a year and that the book Lies of the Magpie is available very soon. The vision for mommaleah is not gone, but revised. Rather than tips, tricks, and home organization secrets (I’m still looking for those), the website focusses on teaching healing for heart, mind, and body. 

It is interesting to reflect on the past four years. The Emily Effect has impacted major changes on legislation to increase screening and resources for postpartum mothers. This is a mission I’m excited to be part of.

mw

Lies of the Magpie Cover Reveal

Cover Reveal Lies of the Magpie a memoir by Maleah Day Warner

Lies of the Magpie Cover Reveal!

It’s time to reveal the FINAL COVER for Lies of the Magpie.

The final decision came down to one surprising element. (Read the end to learn the deciding factor.)

Thanks to everyone who has followed, made observations, and given feedback through this process.

There is a LOT of thought, calculation, and psychology that goes into designing a cover. If you are interested in the behind-the-scenes process of choosing the final cover, below I will walk you through the concept and evolution of each cover, the audience response, the pros & cons, and ultimately why the cover was or was not chosen.

If you just want to see the FINAL COVER, skip to the end. 

Commissioned Artwork

Cover Reveal Lies of the Magpie a memoir by Maleah Day Warner

The first cover was illustrated and painted by artist Bethany Baker three years ago. Check out her work at Midsummer Studios. She will create a custom whimsical portrait of your child, family, or fiancee.

Concept: “The Carnival of Life” Watercolor. Illustrates a mother’s role escorting her child on the rides of life.

Pros: I love the symbolism injected in custom artwork. The red balloon represents the woman’s hopes and dreams. The weight of the magpie is holding down the ballon, preventing it from rising to the height of its potential. Bethany designed the image to wrap around the book’s front and back cover and included space for the title and author.

Cons: I commissioned Bethany to create this cover in 2017 when I was considering self-publishing. Since then, I’ve learned the importance of matching the cover mood and style to the book’s genre. This painted image conveys a children’s picture book more than an adult memoir.

Commercial Artwork

In March I began working with my publisher’s cover designer. I gave her a synopsis of my book as well as the genre and overall tone and said I’d like a magpie and possibly a necklace. The following are the concepts she created. 

Woman’s Profile in Silhouette

Cover Reveal Lies of the Magpie a memoir by Maleah Day Warner

Concept: Vector image. This was the first design I previewed from the designer and it took my breath away. Seeing this made my story come alive.

Audience Response: Facebook Favorite. Marketing Specialist’s Favorite. This was the clear winner of all the vector images. 

Melanie: “To me it signifies there is something in all of us. From the outline of the women and the bird within.”

Colleen: “Creative flow and I love the color”

Kerry: “The theme Lies of the Magpie and it whispering in your ear fits.”

Shanda:  “It needs the silhouette of the girl for the human touch effect.”

Jill: “It draws me in. My kids who love to write voted this one as well.

Pros: The woman’s profile in silhouette hints she has a personal struggle. Something is stopping her from facing life straight on, and you get the hint the magpie plays a big role. Clear and easy to read.

Cons: Hard to find a con other than the weight of the image is heavy on the left and the mood is a bit depressing.

Woman at the Window

Concept: Live photography magpie at window. This was one of my early favorites.

Audience Response: Facebook Winner

Kylene:  “By far my favorite.”

Clarissa: “Caught my eye quick.

Tasha: “Intriguing.”

Lisa: “My least favorite. I find it a little confusing.”

Pros:  The image evokes curiosity and lets you know this will be an emotional story. Lovely use of black & white with hints of color.

Cons: Ultimately the cover is too confusing to understand at first glance. There is a lot going on. The title gets lost in the image. 

Magpie on a Tree Branch

Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Warner Book Cover

Concept: Live Photography of Magpie

Audience Response:

Larita: “Both Lies and Magpie are distinct and pop out. Neither words are mixed into the photo. So clear and grab at you.”

Laurel: “I like the emptiness and use of the negative space.”

Ryan: “Nice and simple. No images conflicting with the title.

Pros: People like this cover for its clarity and use of white space. 

Cons: Gives the impression of being a nonfiction nature book rather than literary memoir.

Magpie in Flight

Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Warner Book Cover

Concept: Thieving magpie flies away with the story.

Audience response: Editor’s Favorite.

Brooke: “Like the colors and letter font. Love the bird in flight

Ashley: “The blue one!”

Pros: The color and unique font. Reminds people of the book Wonder.

Cons: While the font is awesome, it’s also difficult to read. And it’s hard to tell if this book is for teens or adults. 

Magpie with Woman in Cage

Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Warner Book Cover

Concept: Woman in Cage. In an unintentional effort to confuse my cover designer and complicate the process, I found this image of a woman in a cage which I LOVED. My designer created a dozen variations of this concept including the magpie holding the cage by a chain in its talons. This is the cover I’ve had the hardest time letting go of.

Audience Response: Publisher’s Favorite. Author’s favorite (except for the final cover).

Kris Stena “It intrigues all of us in my family, makes us want to know why she’s in there.”

Sashleigha: “Girl in the cage for sure.

Tessy: “Shows there is a story within the book.”

Jean: “This is the most intriguing to me… it’s like… hmmmm. what’s this book all about???”

Roberti: “This one  feels very depressing and  personally, I would not pick it up.”

Pros: I love the idea of a woman trapped in the cage while the bird is outside calling the shots. A lot of power and metaphor in the image. Also conveys there is an intricate story within the pages.

Cons: Some readers were turned off by the oppressive tone of this cover image. Some confused it for a story about domestic violence.

Final Cut: While intriguing, this cover could trigger too much negative emotion and might mislead readers to thinking it’s a story of abuse.

Magpie Whispers in Woman’s Ear

Cover Reveal Lies of the Magpie a memoir by Maleah Day Warner

Concept: Live Photography with whispering magpie.

Audience Response: Mr. Warner’s Favorite. A Facebook Favorite, this cover tied in votes with the Magpie at the Window.

Brooke: “It looks like the magpie is whispering lies.

Emily: “This is my favourite – it’s alluring, intense, emotive.”

Janine: “I like this one best. I was intrigued and wanted to know what the magpie was whispering in her ear….”

Lori: “The visuals are mentally stimulating and curiosity evoking.”

Pros: This cover showcases what a rockstar the designer is. Look at the lighting on the woman’s hair! So much emotion. Title is clear and easy to read. 

Cons: My daughter thought this looked like the cover of a romance instead of memoir. Cover reveals too much of the story.

Final Cut: This cover almost needs a warning that says “Spoiler Alert.” It gives away too much too soon.

And the Final Book Cover Is . . .

Magpie with Necklace

Lies of the Magpie by Maleah Day Warner Book Cover

Concept: Simple illustration of magpie with locket in its beak.

Audience Response: Gotcha! I didn’t show this image on the Facebook or Instagram polls because I wanted it to be a surprise!

Abigail: “Love this. Looks very clean and professional.”

Cons: Interestingly, when shown to fellow authors from my publishers group, NOT ONE person voted for this cover. And yet this is the cover. WHY? There is a lot of calculation and psychology that goes into cover selection.

Pros:

  1. Title stands out: One strength of this book is an amazing title, and this cover lets the title do the talking.
  2. Clear: Many readers select a book based on a thumbnail image on Kindle, Overdrive, or Barnes & Noble online. These small images need to be clear and readable.
  3. Simple: If a cover is too complicated or confusing, a reader might assume the book will be too confusing and will pass it by.
  4. Tone: This book might be about postpartum depression, but the story is NOT depressing. This cover conveys a book filled with humor, colorful metaphor, propelling symbolism, and  narrative that is almost cartoon-like in its perspective on the struggle of family life.
  5. Curiosity: You can’t deny that this little magpie perks your curiosity. What is it doing with that necklace in its beak? This cover hints at mystery and surprise within the pages of the book. The reader anticipates being taken on a fascinating journey of discovery.

Final Cut: Ultimately, one factor finalized the decision to go with this book cover.

MEN!

Yes. You men were the deciding vote!

One might think a book that recounts pregnancy and childbirth in explicit detail might be just for women. However, the beta readers who finished fastest and had the most to say have all been men. A majority of my first endorsements were from men.

Perhaps this is because men have always wondered what goes on in a woman’s head and this book gives them a front row seat to one woman’s psyche. 

Ultimately, the final selling point was choosing a cover that wouldn’t be a barrier to men reading this powerful story. In addition to all the above factors, this is a cover a man could hold in an airport or have on his office desk or nightstand without appearing to be reading women’s romance.

What do you think?  Were you surprised?

I’d love to hear your comments. Thanks for following this cover journey.

Ep. 5 Permission to Make Decisions

Permission to MAKE DECISIONS

Have you given yourself PERMISSION to MAKE DECISIONS?

Humans make an average of 35,000 remotely conscious decisions a day. If that statistic makes your feel more panicked than empowered, then you are in the right place. Making decisions can be confusing, overwhelming, and even paralyzing. And there are good reasons. This episode discusses six barriers that block us from making decisions and four ways to power through those barriers in order to learn to make decisions like a boss. 

 

Six Barriers to Decision Making

How do you feel about making decisions?  Determined or indecisive? Confident or hesitant? Resolute or wishy-washy?

No matter your past experience with making decisions, you have the ability, starting today, you have the ability to learn how and to practice becoming an effective decision-maker.

The first step is to increase your personal awareness about your decision-making process. Awareness is the first step to change. And don’t criticize yourself. You don’t get positive results in life by thinking negatively.

Here are six barriers that trip you up in the decision-making process: 

  1. LABELING:

    Too often, we make a decision, then wait for the result to decide whether it was a good or bad decision.  If the results turn out well, then we say it was the right decision, but if the results go sour, we say we made the wrong decision. It is harmful and paralyzing to measure our decision based on outcome. It is called OUTcome, because it is OUTside of our control. The truth is that we have to make the best decision we can based on the information we have at the time. We aren’t fortune tellers, so it isn’t fair to judge our present decision based on unpredictable future results.

  2. I DON’T KNOW: Saying “I don’t know” drains our power. We have access to incredible information. It’s better to say, “I am in the process of figuring it out,” or “I am exploring my options,” or even, “I am open to possibilities.”
  3. FEAR: Fear of the future outcome can block us from making a decision in the present. Maybe we’re afraid of failing, or maybe we’re afraid of being wildly successful. More than anything, our brains are afraid of the unknown. Our subconscious loves its comfort zone; it likes to stay right here where everything is familiar, so our subconscious often sabotages us from making a decision that would take us outside our comfort zone. 
  4. OBSTACLES: Our brain wants to avoid obstacles and challenges. In fact, sometimes if we run into a challenge, then our brain tries to tell us that we made the wrong choice. This is not true. Obstacles don’t mean that path is wrong. It means you’re going to have to summon your courage, get a running leap and get through the hurdles.   
  5. UNCHOOSING: Okay. Technically unchoosing is not a word, but it is a real barrier to decision making. This is the challenge that choosing one menu item at a restaurant means “unchoosing” all the other delicious possibilities. The reality of being burdened by options can render making a decision painful or next to impossible.
  6. OVERTHINKING:  Research shows that the prime age for overthinking is between 25 to 37. Overthinking is trying to hard to find the “RIGHT” decision. It’s a paralysis of “I can’t choose this one because maybe a different one is better.” Overthinking is more harmful than beneficial, but there are ways to stop overthinking.

How to Become an Effective Decision-Maker

You can learn to become an effective decision-maker. Here are four simple and effective TOOLS for becoming more confident, self-trusting, and speedy in making decisions.

1.  PERMISSION TO GET OUT OF “I DON’T KNOW”     

    So you don’t know what you want to study in college or do for your career, but sitting in the “I Don’t Know” chair is NOT going to help you figure it out. You don’t discover your favorite flavor of ice cream by never tasting ice cream. An important part of decision-making is exploration and discovery. You may have to get our there and try a lot of things before you DO know what you want. Give yourself permission to get out of “I Don’t Know” and enter “I am exploring options.”

2.  PERMISSION TO LET GO OF THE MYTH OF RIGHT OR WRONG DECISIONS

Life is not a quiz with right or wrong answers. The truth is that you don’t “know” your life path, rather, you “create” your life path, so there are not right or wrong decisions. Certainly there are consequences for every decision, but maybe those consequences will be what you need in order to learn, grow, and become a better person. The process of making decisions create opportunities to progress. Not making decisions makes your life stagnant and stifles growth. So practice making decisions whether it’s painting a wall or re-arranging the furniture. 

3.   PERMISSION FOR UNLIMITED DECISIONS

Unless you choose the poisoned drink or the tunnel with the fire-breathing dragon (which might be the final decision you ever make)  few decisions are ever final. Very few decision are life or death. This is good news. Make the best decision you can today, and you can make a new decision later. Trust that you have the intelligence and ability to manage the consequences of your decisions.

4.  PERMISSION to OWN YOUR DECISIONS 

It’s tempting to choose your spot of grass, then stare longingly at the green grass in the other field. The truth is that every field has spots of lush green and spots of wilted, dead, sour grass. You notice your own wilted patches more because you are closer, but the other field has dead spots, too. 

 

 




 

Ep. 4 Permission to Make Life Easier

Make Your Life Easier

Permission to Make Life Easier

Today’s episode discusses 4 Principles to Make Life Easier.

Last episode was about The Power of Permission and the different sources we look to gain permission.

Today’s episodes addresses 4 specific permissions that can make life easier. We hear that life is supposed to be hard. I used to believe that if my life wasn’t hard, then I must not be working hard enough, but that is a false belief. Life does not have to be hard. We make life hard through our thoughts and feelings.

1. Give Yourself Permission to De-Complicate

Are you making your life harder than it needs to be?

Do you actually make your life more complicated?

In her book, “If Life Were Easy It Wouldn’t Be Hard” author Sheri Dew tells her story of a midnight hotel evacuation. She carried two large suitcases down flights before realizing that none of the other guests were bringing their luggage. Hauling all that extra weight resulted in double knee surgery. Sometimes we make our lives harder than they need to be by the extra baggage we carry. 

2. Give Yourself Permission to Do Less

You are the CEO of your life and it’s your responsibility to fire, lay-off, cut-back any employees, divisions, or tasks that do not serve your company mission.

You have a book of Pink Slips. Use them!

3. Let Go the 4.0

This isn’t high school and trying to achieve a 4.0 in EVERY aspect of life is unrealistic and will lead to exhaustion and illness. Give yourself permission to do some tasks at 70% so you have more time, resources, and energy to devote to the things that matter most.

4. Solve Problems Without Making a Fuss.

Have you noticed that some people seem to never have problems while other people seem to constantly have problems? Then you realize the first group just doesn’t make a big deal. Rather, they solve problems without fuss. Some chill friends taught me how to give myself permission to solve problems the best way I could without over-thinking and over-complicating the issue.